Peace in Uncertainty

If I feel uncertain about something or a situation, I go back to what I can always be certain about now, myself. I can be there for myself, I can care for myself, I can love myself. I am able to center my mind, body, and soul now and being confident in that is so comforting. This took me a long time to get to. For years I was searching for versions of myself. Trying to be like other people and trying to look like other people because I was so uncomfortable in my own skin. I had growing pains, mentally and emotionally. I was constantly trying to hide parts of myself I hated. I would try to implement healthy habits but for the wrong reasons. The reasons weren’t coming out of a place of love or out of a place of trying to make my future self proud. They were coming out of a place of hate and punishment because I felt I wasn’t good enough. I got tired of feeling that way- I could tell I was tried in every aspect of my life. I took hold of that.

I can confidently say now that I every time I move my body or eat a healthy meal it truly comes out of a place of love and self compassion and respect. I truly care for the vessel I was given to move through this world with and I want to show up for myself and others in the most humble and caring way I possibly can. When a workout felt hard, the past version of myself used to push myself harder because I felt I was weak. But now, when a workout is difficult, I remember how strong I am and I remember how grateful I am to move and to breathe and I let that positive energy move through my body.

I choose to not live in the past anymore and knowledge how much I’ve grown. I don’t fear the past anymore because it will never come again and it’s just a thought now. I choose to live my life living in the present and doing things for my future self, but not dwelling on that idea, just letting it positively move me forward.